Grades!

A frequent stressor for new high school students—especially for kids who come into a college preparatory school with a record of success in middle school— is grades. Though each child is different and has a unique story, the stress often manifests this way: The child begins receiving grades which are significantly lower than middle school. In response, the student works harder than ever, foregoing things that gave him or her joy (sports, dancing, horses, music lessons, whatever)  “because he or she doesn’t have time” to do those things. But even then, grades don’t improve much. The child is miserable. Parents are understandably worried. Often they are upset with the teacher for “unreasonable standards. “

I believe there are a few points of perspective for us to bring into these discussions:

First, a big picture view is important. Middle school grades are generally higher than high school nationally (though both  are inflated.) In our school, on the basis of the transcripts we receive, I estimate the average G.P.A. of an incoming eighth grader is somewhere between 3.5 and a 3.7—in other words, an “A.” The average grade at our high school is between a 3.2. and a 3.4, or a  "B/B+.”  So, there’s likely going to be lesser grades in high school. It’s normal.

Elementary grades are usually  heavily weighted on effort and less on a performance standard. Most often, if children work hard, they earn an “A.” There’s some of that in high schools, too, but because of A.P. scores, A.C.T. results and college admissions standards, high school teachers must measure their results against outside criteria that puts a check to what they represent to colleges as their “A” students. 

Especially for really hard working students who have have made mostly A’s through great effort, it is truly jarring to get B’s and C’s for the first time! Their instinctive response? To apply the formula that’s worked in the past: to double down on their effort. They “carve out” more time in their day, foregoing the things they love doing.  They work later into the night at the expense of sleep, which makes them groggy in class the next day, diminishing their understanding of the material. It’s a declining spiral. 

But if the grade is defined more by a performance standard than effort, effort alone, even Herculean effort, will not yield the results the child is working so hard to obtain. That’s where the stress and unhappiness comes in. That’s frequently when parents ask to meet with us at the school.  

This stress is exacerbated by a culture that idolizes success, defined as “getting the trophy,” or “earning the A.” A mere “B,” or the “silver medal” as Jerry Seinfeld once quipped about Olympic athletes, is given to the “first loser.” “Of all the other losers,” Seinfeld says, “the silver medalist is best.” "No one," he adds, "loses better than you." In high schools, with students who are used to A’s, getting a “B” is sometimes the emotional equivalent of failing. 

So how should a high school and families approach these issues? 

I believe, to begin, high schools must re-define success for students and families, and do their best to help parents re-define success with them. Success can no longer be measured purely by getting A’s. It must be defined as “best effort,” not “optimum results.“  If a child is attending school faithfully, doing his or her homework, and seeking out help from teachers where he or she struggles, that child is doing all he or she can do.  He or she should be praised for that, regardless of grades! For a kid who struggles in high school but demonstrates outstanding effort, I recommend parents take their child out to dinner as an “atta boy” the day BEFORE grades come out,  to communicate that’s what matters most to them. Maybe the grades aren’t exemplary,  but that is secondary to the child’s effort. Bravo to that child! 

Second, I believe it’s important to reclaim the “B” as a “good” grade within the culture of our schools.  It either represents “above average effort” or “above average performance.” Whereas students may not be able to “work their way to an A,” I believe they should be able to do so for a B.  Taking away grades such as P.E. and other “non-academic” classes, I believe the B should be the most common grade given in class college preparatory high schools.  But in most high schools, A’s are twice as common. 

Third, we must define an “A” as optimum performance, not optimum effort. Not everyone is capable of making A’s anymore than everyone is capable of shooting a graceful, left handed layup, rising off the floor on the inside foot and shooting with the left hand. Some people simply don’t have the athletic ability. They can get better at it with a lot of practice, but will never do it as gracefully and reliably as a gifted athlete. In some classes, an “A” may be outside the reach of a student, even one that works hard. 

Here’s a helpful question to ponder as teachers that will begin to sort out the A/B imbalance: “What can an A student do in our classes that a B student cannot do—without using numbers to describe the difference? “ Most of us cannot really answer that very well, because we don’t tie our “A” performance to a particular level of thinking so much as to a percentage right or wrong. But if we did—if, for example A questions were aimed at truly higher levels of thinking (In Bloom’s taxonomy: application level, analysis level, synthesis, etc) we would have many more B’s.  

Fourth, schools must respond to the concern “this hurts my child’s chances for college admissions or a scholarship.”  Many parents are convinced that every “B” their child makes diminishes their child’s chance of acceptance and scholarships, whereas colleges don’t see it that way. Colleges can’t trust high school grades very much, because they are so inflated and vary wildly between institutions. Instead, they focus on difficulty of classes taken, test scores, references and resumes. This isn’t to say that grades are UNIMPORTANT. If we’re comparing a student with a 2.9 vs. a 3.9, the colleges are going to favor the 3.9. But there’s very little difference to a college between students with a 4.0, 3.9 or 3.8 if they’re taking rigorous courses. Honors and A.P. classes are more important to colleges than all A’s. 

Most importantly, we must be gentle, kind and understanding of what our students are going through. Their world is being rocked a bit and their confidence is waning. They need our support and affirmation. We need to remind them that their effort is the most important thing, and assure them that the grades will take care of themselves.  We must find ways to reward and compliment effort. We must be good communicators with parents, and take the opportunity to give frequent praise to the parents about their child. They are feeling vulnerable also!